Meantime

Skipping events, 1970's romantic psychology, denim skirts, organic shapes, Lip Smackers for grown ups, camellia gardens, red pesto as a condiment, humble pie, Spring sounds, good reads

I spent Valentine’s Day proper sitting in my hotel room, eating Joe Shanghai’s soup dumplings and battling what I thought was a cold (but turned out to be seasonal allergies as an unusual, spring-like warmth encompassed New York City). The next day, I embarked on a belated celebration of the Hallmark founded holiday with a solo expedition to Smalls jazz club in the West Village. I skipped three fashion week parties that night (sincerest apologies to the respective brands) and have never felt more fulfilled. As I boarded my return flight to Toronto the next morning (albeit a bit tearfully - I recently learned of the interplay between altitude and emotional release), I left New York with a different energy, a resounding difference from the bitter sentiment I possessed after trying to live in Park Slope the summer of 2021.

While listening to The Happiness Lab I was reminded of a psychology study from the 70’s by Donald Dutton and Arthur Aron (their alliterative names do not escape me, I find this a bemusing gem in the all too serious field of academia). Fondly known as the Suspension Bridge experiment, the objective was to demonstrate human misjudgment of high levels of arousal. In typical 70’s, heteronormative fashion, a man (it’s always a man) would walk across a bridge only be approached by an attractive woman (subjective, I know. Hear me out). According to the results, men on a more shaky bridge were more likely to ask the woman out as opposed to the control group of men on a stable bridge. Dutton and Aron thus concluded that the men mistakenly attributed the physiological symptoms from being on a shaky bridge (read: increased heart rate, increased perspiration, etc.) to arousal from the attractive woman’s presence.

Extrapolate what you will - the verdict stands that attraction is such a chance and inexplicable phenomenon that we could be mistaking for ourselves. What were the men actually feeling? Physiological symptoms or attraction? When I meet anyone now in a romantic context, I now think of my own life situation: am I simply engaging because I feel unstable or insecure?; am I truly enjoying this or simply feel obliged?; or even in the inverse scenario, is the other individual in a turbulent point of their life? Dutton, Aron, et al. have afforded me the ability to empathize - I’ve since been provided an ample amount of clarity from so many situations in my life.

Anyway. There’s the relationship advice for cuffing season you didn’t ask for. I think about this a lot.

On a far brighter, more interesting note, Spring is around the corner. Despite the foot of snow that Toronto failed to plow from the streets, I’m feeling a gust of warmth (be it literal or metaphorical) coming in from the months ahead. As I embark on the slushiest and most miserable of winter runs, I remind myself of how much fun this will be in a few months when the seasons change. We’re in the throes of the meantime. And that makes me stoked to prepare my upcoming spring wardrobe and beauty closet, eat more vegetables, maybe even drink more water. Is that wellness?

1. What I’m eyeing/buying

• The minute I landed in New York I hit the ground running, grabbing a quick bite to eat at The Odeon before stopping by the Acne Studios store in SoHo for their Larry Stanton exhibition event. Stanton and the beautiful garments aside, I fell in love with this jacket and have luckily added it to my wardrobe since trying it on in NYC.

• When I saw Kirsten Grace Lam wear a long denim skirt, I ordered a long denim skirt. This viral Agolde piece is mostly out of stock, but luckily the link provided here has quatities left! Pair it with the above leather jacket, a t-shirt, knit, anything goes. Should you prefer a skirt with front opening (or are just particularly enthusiastic about the return of the long denim skirt), consider this pair or this Magda Butrym piece, or this incredible Margiela high rise long skirt with contrast panelling.

• I feel like a fairy princess when I wear these flats from The Row - the contrasting black strap with white leather is a lovely deviation from quintessential cream ballet flats. They feel childlike and sophisticated all at once, which is something I never thought I’d say. But here we are. They come in a chic chocolate brown as well, if you’re skeptical of anything that might get scuffed. Similar but slightly more elfin in demeanour are these gorgeous Jil Sander flats - the stitching detail and pointed toe just get me, you know?

• I’m shamelessly coining the pearl as my favourite embellishment - my shell pearl barrettes from last month’s newsletter made an appearance at an Armani Beauty dinner in NYC. I’m also dying over the Jimmy Choo suede Ade slippers (far better and more structured than the Miu Miu pink ones, in my opinion, though I’ll forever be a Miu Miu girl)

• The 2000’s were the years of unnecessary belts, and though I’m still thrown off kilter by the fact that this is the first fashion cycle I originally lived through that’s resurfacing, I’m not angry about bringing back the concept of a belt as form rather than function. Gabriela Hearst’s belts make the boldest statements, and though I’m heartbroken that they no longer make the Golden Ratio Shell Belt, I do love this flower motif and organic buckle shape.

• My friend Alyssa has the coolest and most effortless, fun style. Whenever she’s in Toronto it’s always a treat seeing her outfits (and her, too, obviously). She owns New Classics, an e-retailer that brings a beautiful and eclectic curation of small, noteworthy brands together. It’s also a wonderful place to shop brands in Canada without any surprise duty fees - I’m eyeing the deliciously fresh and delightful new jewellery pieces they’ve stocked, including this salad necklace and this watery clear shell pendant.

• Reformation recently opened their second Toronto store in Yorkville, and peeping some of my friends’ Instagram stories had me scrambling to get to the computer and browse their latest spring collection. I’m fawning over this green silk maxi dress (the perfect wedding guest piece), long denim skirt (yes, yet another one), and ivory embroidered bustier.

• At the Uniqlo SS23 preview recently, my friend Neelam and I were discussing the myriad styling opportunities of an Old Céline-esque faux leather crossbody wallet, made in a calming cornflower blue that caught our eyes immediately. She brilliantly suggested pairing two in different colours (might I suggest the blue mixed with either black or beige?), adjusting the strap lengths on each so that they would sit at different lengths.

• A moment where I shopped in my own closet - I’ve had this incredible pair of Ganni cargo jeans with lime contrast stitching sitting in my closet for about a month. They run the risk of styling too Gen Z for my personal taste, but I paired them with a James Street Co. heavy knit pullover (this particular style is no longer available in black, but this quarter zip pullover is), black New Balance 996’s (nothing chunky), and my croissant bag for a new winter uniform.

• Most definitely not a casual purchase (but something I enjoy admiring from afar) is the Bottega Sardine Bag. Just when I was feeling unsure about intrecciato weaving (is it too ubiquitous? Does it align with the more cringey era that was the last few seasons of Daniel Lee’s time at the house?), they threw in the perfect gold handle.

• The perfect spring trench coat comes in the form of FWSS’ Anchorage trench. Perfectly A-line, cropped just above the knee, this just arrived in the mail and is such beautiful quality. This, with vintage jeans, a cozy knit, a baseball cap, and the Uniqlo crossbody wallets, defines an elegant weekend look.

• Les Coyotes de Paris threw a curveball with their rebrand to Rohé, but have recently since relaunched as a little sister-esque brand to the latter. I’m anticipating the onset of spring/summer with these floral cut out pants, perfect for a night out dancing. Note that their sizing runs a bit larger and are made for tall people - I’m 165cm, order the smallest size, and tailor the length accordingly.

• Speaking of Rohé, I love that they’re incorporating beautiful reds, greens, yellows, and blues into their mostly neutral beige colour palette (though ironically most of the pieces I selected fell along the more neutral spectrum). I particularly love this floral silk organza blouse (which conveniently comes with a removable tank top underneath, so you can style with a statement bralette should you be so bold), this incredible white lace shift dress, and this knit polo finished with a silver sculptural button (nothing gets me like a good button!)

• Organic shapes and materials are so satisfying to the eye - anything that recalls Georgia O’Keefe, Barbara Hepworth, Simone Bodemer-Turner; these artists embrace beautiful and surreal feminine curves in a way that I hope influences not just my aesthetic style, but my mannerisms as well. It’s specifically these artists that fuel my love for much loved jewellery designers such as Charlotte Chesnais and Agmes NYC (who actually did a capsule collection with Turner). I particularly am loving these Rohé Smithson earrings, these beautiful pearl-adorned spirals from my New Zealand favourite Flash Jewellery (also fawning over this nested Topaz ring, that recalls visceral images of hands gently and protectively holding something nestled within them. Or the Covenant House logo).

• Last one I promise. It’s been a good month for refreshing the wardrobe. I was recently introduced to Soft Goat, who make perfect cashmere knit staples. I fell in love with this oversized sleeve knit (if you can’t already tell, cornflower blue is my absolute favourite. I find it simultaneously striking and soothing), as well as this skirt suit set in brown (which will pair perfectly with high boots. Very Hermès).

2. On beauty

• I’m delighted to report that after a rather rocky start to February, my skin is finally clearing up and the cystic acne scars are beginning to correct themselves. Caudalie’s Vinoperfect serum continues to play an integral role in my healing process - for those unfamiliar with this cult classic, it’s a vitamin C alternative that contains key ingredients like viniferine and olive Squalane. I find this especially helpful for combatting dull winter skin and dark spots from breakouts.

• Another aid for dark spots (which I use less frequently as it’s an exfoliant) is Nudestix Skin’s Citrus Fruit and Glycolic toner. I was skeptical with the mention of fruit (I’m a rather clinical girl myself), but I loved how soft this product made my skin feel the next day. I had the privilege of trying their express facial at Majesty’s Pleasure in Toronto (available now to book!) and absolutely loved the products.

• An unexpected new favourite - YSL Beauty launched the perfect antidote to Rhode Beauty’s lip peptide (I hear mixed things about this, but as it’s unavailable in Canada, I have yet to try it) with their latest Rouge Volupté lip treatment. Applying this creates the perfect wet lip sheen (appropriately called “candy glaze”), and a hint of nostalgia with the watermelon scent. Call it Lip Smackers for grown ups.

• The Chanel Atelier Beauté in SoHo offers a relaxing reprieve from the overwhelming city, and was one of my favourite places to escape when I summered in the city a few years back (read: air conditioning). I had the privilege of doing a fragrance discovery experience, a 45 minute process whereupon you guided on a personalized journey through a multitude of unlabelled scents arranged like a delicate camellia garden. By the end of the experience you discover your signature scent and the story behind it. I discovered Sycomore, my personal favourite with notes of vetiver, cedar, and vanilla. It’s seductive and warm and subtle - all my favourite qualities in a fragrance.

3. On food

After New York, I felt sick of food. An impossible feeling. I love to eat. Take that away from me and you might as well just strip me of my identity. See, this is what happens when I travel and consume solely restaurant food for just about every meal. Things feel a little icky. I was so excited to come home and cook my own food and nourish my body. The act of cooking is love. I wanted to give myself that.

Red pesto is my latest obsession, though perhaps not in the conventional sense - the burst of flavour from sun-dried tomatoes reminds me of fresh summer tomatoes, straight from the vine. For breakfast, lately I’m enjoying a piece of toasted sourdough topped with red pesto and avocado. The quick lunch version of this simple dish comprises red pesto topped with an extra swig of olive oil and anchovies, with bread on the side to dip (maybe even some artichoke preserves). Red pesto offers such complex depth with minimal effort, and is available at most grocery stores in a jar.

One of the first dishes I spent hours (I should note that I like to draw out the cooking process by putting on a comforting TV show, perhaps calling a friend or two…) concocting a vegetarian shepherd’s pie. Piles of vegetables (most of which I had already, as this recipe is forgiving enough that frozen vegetables will still be delicious) and lentils and mashed potatoes results in such a comforting and heartwarming dish. I based this recipe off of a New York Times Cooking recipe by Samantha Seneviratne, adding a few twists to make it my own.

I wanted my version to be flexible and forgiving so that you can make it with items you may already have in your pantry/fridge/freezer, making it a simple dish to prepare when coming home after a long time. I found the original recipe a little confusing with the amount of back and forth between filling and topping, which I think is a little unnecessary for a humble dish like shepherd’s pie (the only type of humble pie I enjoy). When you’re exhausted and drained, the last thing you want is too many steps. I’ve cut down the excess by merging a few steps (the filling gets made all at once while the potatoes are boiling, rather than cooking the lentils first before combining with the rest of the ingredients). I hope you enjoy.

Vegetarian Shepherd’s Pie

Topping ingredients:

• 2lbs potatoes, quartered (I like to leave the peel on for texture. The recipe calls for Russet, but I think any type of good mashing potato works)

• 2 tbsp salt (Diamond crystal kosher is best)

• 1/4 cup melted butter + 2 tbsp (if it’s salted butter, just don’t add too much extra salt)

• 1/2 cup whole milk

• 1/2 cup labneh or fermented dairy of choice (I used labneh as that’s what I had in my fridge. The original recipe calls for sour cream, but greek yogurt or creme fraiche would work beautifully here and likely be fluffier than sour cream)

• 1/2 cup grated Parmigiano

• pepper

Filling ingredients:

• 1 cup mix of seed legumes of choice ( I mixed green lentils, French lentils, and split peas. Whatever I had in the pantry)

• 1-2tbsp Italian/French herb mix (or substitute fresh herbs if you have, I love thyme and rosemary)

• 3-4 cups broth (any kind! If it’s salted, don’t add extra salt to cooking)

• 1/2 onion, diced

• 1 bay leaf

• 2 tbsp olive oil or butter

• 8 oz mushrooms, chopped/sliced (any kind, but I love shiitake. The amount is usually one grocery store package)

• 2 cloves garlic, minced

• 2 tbsp tomato paste

• 2-3 tbsp flour

• 1 cup frozen peas or chopped beans, no need to thaw (I had beans in my freezer from my parents’ garden, and it tasted delicious)

• fresh lemon juice

Method

Bring a large pot of water + 2 tbsp of salt (from the topping ingredients list) to a boil. Once water is boiling, add the potatoes and boil for 15-20 minutes, until the potatoes are fork soft. You need to be able to mash them!

While the potatoes are cooking, heat 2 tbsp olive oil over medium heat (from filling ingredients list) in an oven-safe skillet (ideally you’ll be baking in this vessel…less to wash). Add the mushrooms and cook for about 5, stirring frequently. Add the onion and cook until translucent for about 10 minutes. Add the legumes, carrots, frozen peas/beans, and herbs and toast everything for about 2 minutes, stirring frequently. Then add the tomato paste and stir into the mixture evenly. Add the broth, bay leaf, and 1-2 tbsp salt (if the broth isn’t salted), and cook until the lentils are soft and cooked (about 20 minutes). Add the flour and stir in so that the mixture thickens.

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees Fahrenheit.

Once the potatoes are cooked, transfer them to a large bowl and mash them with a fork. If you’re feeling fancy, you can mash the potatoes through a sieve (as is the French custom), but a few lumps are quite satisfying and homey. Add the melted butter and milk then stir into the mashed potatoes. Add the labneh/fermented dairy last, mixing it in evenly. Enjoy the sensation of the potatoes becoming lighter and fluffier.

Spread the mashed potatoes evenly over the filling. Sprinkle the Parmigiano over the topping, then bake for about 30 minutes, until the potatoes are browning and the pie is bubbling on the edges. Let the pie rest at room temperature for about 30 minutes and resist the urge to eat the pie right away. Indulge.

4. On music

A few repeat songs are present in this month’s playlist. A pure coincidence and a smidge of the fact that I had little time to explore new songs.

5. On reading

A friend of mine fondly said, “Free Food for Millionaires walked so that Pachinko could run.” They were referring to Min Jin Lee’s novels in order of publishing, in response to my critique that I found Free Food very difficult to get through in comparison to other individuals who I knew read the book.

Free Food certainly did its job. At one point I felt so angry that I had to put the book down for a week. I don’t want to spoil anything, but the frustration and tension interwoven between light and redeeming moments seem to be the exact effect that Lee must have strived for when writing this novel. She encapsulates immigrant family dynamics, toxic corporate culture, and an innumerable amount of disconcerting situations into a 663 page epic. Though not my favourite book, it’s certainly worth a read in order to discover the subtle nuances of being a minority, where so many experiences lack the language to articulate.

For my Toronto friends, if you have not already visited Sellers & Newel, it is my favourite secondhand bookshop other than BMV. They host musical/cultural events in their cozy space as well, more info of which can be found on their website. My favourite weekend activity consists of scouring the shelves for a good book and camping out for an hour or so in one of their oversized armchairs.

Until April :)